Tuesday, 21 February 2012


Firstly this Blog is not supposed to be witty, or even clever, it’s just something I think about sometimes, so leave me alone if you don’t like it

I have skirted, danced, sashayed even with religion all my life, I find I want to believe in something but struggle to accept the ”leap of faith”

Firstly to date I have read the nearly all the big religious faiths guide books, the Koran the Bible etc and found while all are an OK read, I never had the moment, the enlightenment that I seen happen in others ,for a short while last year when anyone asked I always answered "Hindu me a shiva are solid mates".

A few years back I worked with an openly honest ex junkie who was a Jehovah witness and seemed to draw allot from it, he never tried to convert me, (something I respect) but he was defiantly a better man for his conversion

So why does none of it work on me? ,it has to be more than just the effort of going, or joining a group, fundamentally I hate all things organised, somewhere in my messed up noodle, nothing that’s structured appeals to me, the very thought of sitting in rows doing anything communal is just so far from me its oddly scary. I have this need to be distracted, its something I do actually think about allot,why is there so much to amuse me out the window? why can I not give the time to devote to a devotion,when I don't not really do much at all the rest of the time,

So I have decided for lent to give up my overly used, easily distracting, love affair with twitter, a small thing to most but I can waste most of a working day just Twatting about in the silliness of it all, and to have to leave it to fester without me is already proving tuffer than I thought it would be.

So why would a non believer need to give something up for a religion he does not believe in, well I want to hedge my bets, its that simple if I get to the end and there is something out there, at least I gave something up once, even a nonsense timewasty toy that is Twitter.

I cant give up the things I love, in no real order Women, cars, women and toys oh and I could never give up women, so twitter had to go, in a month or so I will come back and I doubt it will be any different, endless sex bots sending me endless nonsense and the odd person sending the odd thing I want to read, so see you out there soon

As no-one will likely read this blog, as I can’t tweet it or promote it, oh the irony! I thought I would just add, God if you do exist can do one small thing to make me believe, I just want to be 22 again for a week soon ,not got a  firm date yet but will keep you posted, or not even a week 5 days max, thanks big man  Chris x

Monday, 13 February 2012

Growing Up

I love childish humour ,this is not likely to shock you dear reader ,and there is little chance anything will ever change to make me not adore a good knob gag, But recent events have made me for possibly the first time ever ponder my own mortality; I have lived with the notion that I am indestructible for most my life, and as such have never cared about the passing of time, being comfortably well off and ridiculously good looking. Life has been a total blast, from leaving home at 18 to present day not one day can I hand on heart say I regret, is it luck? I don’t know, I just always seem to land on my feet,

So what’s made me ponder the passing of time well firstly the age of my friends especially new ones seem to be getting much younger, this in itself is ok but the age gap brings the inevitable reference gap, in conversation you say flock of seagulls and the “yoofs” think birds rather than odd eighties pop act, laughing at the fact the young know so little is in itself heart warming, but makes you feel old.

This year after 2 years off the road I am taking on a few charities cycling events, in the past I used to get the bike out and within a week cover 50 miles no issue no need to train that much and with next to aches and pains, this year I have established that the body is no longer the finely tuned performance machine I once thought it was

I have also taken up running something I have never done before although I am improving its bothering me that I am so shit at it, after a solid month of going at least 4 times a week sometimes 5 I am still huffing at 2 miles and dying by 3,when I did take the bike out last week the first thing I noticed was just how dam scary fast it is and how tiny the tyres are, where did this need for safety come from, I still drive a speedy car and drive it like I stole it. And still like to climb stuff and jump off it. but now I think about it first I have never once thought that’s to fast or that’s too dangerous, why now am I becoming a girl, what happens as you age to make you realise that you cant just piss ball about all the time and you have to take care of yourself?

Suddenly not being the youngest in the gang has made me actually start to think 1 day, I will be a fogey its nearer than I ever thought it would be, would I go back in time and do it any different? , no way I would not change a thing, would I go back in time and be 20 again? No way. I would love to have a week there and have an enormous about of sex with 20 year old girls but I would not want to stay, so why I now feel the need to take care of myself is still lost to me,

 I feel the same as before I look almost as good as before, but I can say that being older has allowed me to realise that although I had a blast I don’t really want to do it again, so if I ever do invent a time machine I kind of think I will only travel forwards because looking back only makes you feel old.

I hope 2012 is the year that I may at last get married or at least engaged ,may at last become a sensible mature member of society, now all I need is someone to ask me because there’s no way I am buying a ring, well off I may be crazy I aint!